пятница, 28 сентября 2012 г.

Богатство ли привлекает женщин?

Завистники считают, что женщин привлекают в богачах их деньги. Или то, что можно на эти деньги приобрести. Раньше и я так думал, но затем убедился, что это ложь. Не деньги привлекают женщин. Не автомобили и драгоценности. Не рестораны и дорогая одежда. Не могущество, богатство и элегантность. А то, что сделало человека могущественным, богатым и элегантным. Сила, которой наделены одни и полностью лишены другие.

Examiner и CES для кадета

http://key4test.in/ces5.php

--------------рисунки
Turbocharger - турбокомпрессор
Exhaust valve - выхлопной клапан
Fuel injector - топливная форсунка
Piston - поршень
Connecting rod - шатун
Camshaft - распределительный вал
Crosshead - крейцкопф
Exhaust valve - выхлопной клапан
Crankshaft - коленчатый вал
Piston rod - шток
Adjustable wrench - раздвижной гаечный ключ
Water Pump Pliers - Клещи водяного насоса
Flat file - Плоский файл
Monkey wrench - разводной гаечный ключ
Drill press - сверлильный станок

-----------------аудирование
1-What does the Captain think about the Chief Mate's question?
He wants the OS to train as helmsman today, because they are sailing in open waters and there is not much traffic in the area
2-What does the Chief Mate want the OS to do?
He wants the OS to show him where the switch that changes between automatic, manual, and emergency steering is
3-What will the cadet find in the maintenance manual?
He will find a lubricating chart in the maintenance manual
4-What will the cadet find in the engine store?
He will find new brake bands in the engine store
5-What is the hydraulic hand pump usually used for?
The hydraulic pump is usually used for tightening the G-nuts
6-What does the Chief Officer want the 1st Engineer to do?
The Chief Officer wants the 1st Engineer to empty the starboard bilge in hold No. 5
7-What was blocking the grease pipe?
Stuck grease was blocking the grease pipe
8-What does the Captain want to have done?
He wants the Chief Officer to organise a lifeboat drill
9-If something is broken, what should the First Mate do?
He is to notify the Chief Officer
10-What is the AB to do?
He is to help the other crew members and fetch more Vaseline from the storage room if they run short
11-What does the Captain mean?
Set the engine to dead slow ahead, and change the course 10 degrees to port
13-What does the Chief Mate want to have done?
He wants all the lashings tightened and two extra chains fastened to each container
14-When is the 2nd Mate supposed to call the Captain?
When anything unusual happens, and 30 minutes before the pilot station
15-What is the Chief Mate worried about?
He is worried that oil will run through the outlets and into the sea
16-Why does the Chief Mate have to reorder the cargo plan?
The wheels of hatchcover No. 7 came out off their tracks
17-Why does the Chief Mate want to have two look-outs on watch?
Because the Captain expects fog early in the morning
18-What was the cadet to be aware of when using the needle gun?
He should be aware of the steel thickness of the valve
19-Why is it impossible to have a lifeboat drill at present?
Because the ship is leaving after sunset the following day
20-How is the 3rd Mate going to arrange the mooring lines?
He wants two spring lines, four stern lines and no breasts
22-What kind of problems have they had?
They have had problems securing the gangway
23-What mooring lines are they going to let go?
They are to let go on the stern lines
24-What has the Bosun done to prepare the anchoring?
He has disengaged the windlass and put the brake on
25-What is the Chief Mate asking for?
He is asking about the position of the chain
26-What are the Bosun and 2nd Mate going to do?
They are going to weigh the anchor
27-What are the Chief Mate's orders?
He wants the anchor secured thoroughly
28-What is principally to be done when they arrive in Rotterdam?
They have to bunker fuel oil and diesel oil
29-What is the Fitter asked to do?
He is to check the heater for the hydraulic oil
31-What is the cadet ordered to do?
He is supposed to paint the evaporator and use a brush to apply the paint
32-What does the 1 Engineer want to have done?
He wants the heating coils inspected

------------------параметры судна и фигуры
1-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "ABEAM" are shown. Which one is the correct one?
Abeam is defined as A on the figure
2-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "AFT" are shown. Which one is the correct one?
Aft is defined as A on the figure
3-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "AFT BREAST LINE" are shown. Which one is the correct one?
Aft breast line is defined as B on the figure
4-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "AFT SPRING" are shown. Which one is the correct one?
Aft spring is defined as A on the figure
5-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "ASTERN" are shown. Which one is the correct one?
Astern is defined as D on the figure
6-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "BOLLARD" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Bollard is given by D on the figure
7-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "BOW/STEM" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Bow/stem is given by B on the figure
8-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "BREADTH" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Breadth is given by B on the figure
9-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "Bridge" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Bridge is given by A on the figure
10-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "BUOY LINE" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Buoy line is given by A on the figure
11-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "CAPSTAN" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Capstan is given by A on the figure
12-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "DRAUGHT" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Draught is given by D on the figure
13-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "FAIRLEAD" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Fairlead is given by C on the figure
14-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "FORECASTLE" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Forecastle is given by B on the figure
15-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "FORWARD" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Forward is given by C on the figure
16-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "FORWARD BREAST LINE" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Forward breast line is given by C on the figure
17-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "FORWARD SPRING" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Forward spring is given by D on the figure
18-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "FREEBOARD" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Freeboard is given by B on the figure
19-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "HEAD LINE" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Head line is given by B on the figure
20-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "HEIGHT" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Height is given by D on the figure
21-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "LENGHT OVERALL" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Lenght overall is given by B on the figure
22-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "MOORING BUOY" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Mooring buoy is given by B on the figure
23-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "PORT QUARTER" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Port quarter is given by D on the figure
24-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "QUAY" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Quay is given by A on the figure
25-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "ROLLER FAIRLEAD" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Roller fairlead is given by B on the figure
26-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "STARBOARD BOW" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Starboard bow is given by A on the figure
27-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "STARBOARD QUARTER" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Starboard quarter is given by C on the figure
28-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "STERN LINE" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Stern line is given by A on the figure
29-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "TUG TOWING LINE" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Tug towing line is given by D on the figure
30-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "UNDER KEEL CLEARANCE" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Under keel clearance is given by C on the figure
31-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "WINDLASS" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Windlass is given by B on the figure
32-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "AHEAD" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Ahead is given by A on the figure
33-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "CENTRE LINE" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Centre line is given by A on the figure
34-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "MIDSHIPS" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Midships is given by B on the figure
35-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "STERN" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Stern is given by C on the figure
36-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "PANAMA LEAD" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Panama lead is given by C on the figure
37-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "AIR DRAUGHT" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Air draught is given by C on the figure
38-On the figure 4 possible definitions of the term "DEPTH TO MAIN DECK" are given. Which one is the correct one?
Depth is given by B on the figure

-------------------------читать с рамкой
1-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What are the most severe challenges to the shipping industri today?
The main problems are the aging world fleet and old ships.
2-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What has been ascertained after recent debates?
That there is great concern and interest regarding the safety at sea.
3-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What is needed to set the searchlight on quality and safety?
That safety work is lively backed by public opinion.
4-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What is regarded as a threat to lives at sea and the marine environment?
Bad management and poorly maintained old  ships have during several years proven to be fatal.
5-Read the text in the frame before answering the question:Why would the shipping world have serious problems if all the old tonnage was taken out of service today?
Because we need old ships in good condition to meet the
world's demand for transportation.
6-Read the text in the frame before answering the question:How will you characterise the period from 1975 to 1985?
That period was an economic recession for the greater part of the industry.
7-Read the text in the frame before answering the question:Why are the classification societies regarded as the resource best qualified to assess quality?
Because they have the expertise necessary to evaluate the technical standard of the ships.
8-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What are the most serious effect of rust attacks?
Gradually the rust attacks will affect the structural strength.
9-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What is alleged to be the solution to the problem of the increasing age of the world's fleet?
To step up the building of new ships.
10-What should be the duties of crew members not assigned to emergency teams?
They should prepare survival crafts and in general render assistance where needed.
11-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: If you should be involved in a collision you should first of all:
Stop the engine.

-------------------------читать без рамки
1-What is the objective of the  international merchant fleet?
To meet the requirements of goods to be transported.
2-What are the advantage with large ships?
They are economical to operate.
3-In which ways do we benefit from technical improvements in machinery and fuel?
By providing increased space for cargo at a comparatively low cost.
4-Which aspect seems to be most important today?
To attain full utilization of cargo space.
5-What has led to the development of special purpose ships?
The fact that special trends have been followed to attain more efficient cargo handling.
6-Are all special purpose ships constructed for carrying one type of cargo?
No, some ships are constructed to carry out particular tasks which are not connected to cargo.
7-What are the main trends of specialization in the international fleet?
The containerships and the unitization of cargo.
8-Why is a container ship more efficient than ordinary cargo ship?
Because the containers can be easily stacked on board.
9-What is the main reason for using big bulk carriers?
To transport cargoes in large volumes.
10-Why is a wide flexibility desirable when looking for cargoes to be shipped?
Because higher freight rates can be attained.
11-What is the primary responsibility of the engineer officer in charge of a watch?
To ensure safe and efficient operation.
12-What are the duties of engine room ratings forming part of an engine room watch?
To assist in the efficient and safe watchkeeping.
13-What actions shall be taken if any machinery is not functioning properly?
The condition shall be noted and plans for further actions developed.
14-What are the duties of the engineer officer in charge of the watch?
To keep constant surveillance of machinery and auxiliary systems.
15-When shall the engineer officer in charge of a watch be readily capable for operating the propulsion equipment?
When the machinery spaces are in the manned condition.
16-What shall be ensured when in the manual mode of operation?
That the main propulsion unit controls are attended under standby condition.
17-Under what circumstances can the engineer officer in charge of a watch undertake other duties?
When he is properly relieved.
--------------------светлое
21-Read this  text and answer why pre - sea training is recommended?
This will greatly enhance the possibilities for a seafarer to look after himself in an emergency stuation.
22-Read this text and answer this question: What should be given to prospective seafarers?
Approved training.
23-Read this text and answer the question: To whom should training in personal survival techniques be given?
To all seafarers.
24-Read this text and answer the question: When should training in personal survival techniques be given?
Before being employed.
25-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What are the most severe challenges to the shipping industry today?
The main problems are the aging world fleet and old ships.
26-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What has been ascertained after recent debates?
That there is great concern and interest regarding the safety at sea.
27-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What is needed to set the searchlight on quality and safety?
That safety work is vigorously backed by public opinion.
28-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What is regarded as a threat to lives at sea and the marine environment?
Bad management and poorly maintained old  ships have during several years proven to be fatal.
29-Read the text in the frame before answering the question:Why would the shipping world have serious problems if all the old tonnage was taken out of service today?
Because we need old ships in good condition to meet the world's demand for transportation.
30-Read the text in the frame before answering the question:How will you characterise the period from 1975 to 1985?
There was an economic recession for the greater part of the industry.
31-Read the text in the frame before answering the question:Why are the classification societies regarded as the resource best qualified to assess quality?
Because they have the expertise necessary to evaluate the technical standard of the ships.
32-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What is the most serious effect of rust attacks?
Gradually the rust attacks will affect the structural strength.
33-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: What is alleged to be the solution to the problem of the increasing age of the world's fleet?
To step up the building of new ships.
34-What should be the duties of crew members not assigned to emergency teams?
They should prepare survival crafts and in general render assistance where needed.
35-Read the text in the frame before answering the question: If you should be involved in a collision you should first of all:
Stop the engine.

-------------------вахта в машинном отделении
1-In accordance with SOLAS and some international regulations, certain important functions shall always be  tested prior to arrival and departure. What functions?
All mentioned functions
2-In accordance with SOLAS and some international regulations, a very important function shall be strictly tested prior to arrival and departure. In addition regular drills shall be performed ensuring proper operating function and cooperation of the functions. What function?
Steering gear and functions
3-What rules and regulations are regulating the watch keeping routines in the engine room?
Both STCW and Class rules
4-Watch keeping engineers shall have a minimum of knowledge of the vessel's engine room and operation of its functions prior to being accepted as Engineer on Duty, and shall acknowledge his familiarization with the equipment by signing a check list listing all units he shall be able to operate. Minimum knowledge is:
He shall have all the knowledge as listed in the other alternatives
5-For any engine room operated in UMS-mode, defined checks are to be carried out prior to switching to UMS-mode. Is it the Engineer on Duty's responsibility to have the full control of condition of any check items prior to switching to UMS-mode and leaving the engine room, or may he leave the engine room for a short period (coffe break, lunch etc.) trusting the alarms and automatic functions are sufficient for safe operation?
A described UMS-mode check shall always be carried out prior to leaving the engine room, irrespective of the time he will be absent.
6-Prior to the lunch break, the Engineer on Duty observes that the operating generator set has an output of 90%. With regard to operation of the generator, what is the - most important - assumption(s) for him to check before switching to UMS-mode?
That a secondary auxiliary set is switched to automatic standby mode
7-One of the Main Engine cooling pumps is down for maintenance. The rest of the cooling pumps are operating on full capacity with minimum margins on the maximum temperature limit. What will be the correct precaution or action to take at the end of the day?
Operate the engine room on manual mode until the cooling pump is in operation, switched in stand-by mode.
8-During a routine seapassage the cooling water high temperature alarm system for one of the auxiliary engines is out of function and blocked. What will be the appropriate immediate action?
All the actions listed in the other alternatives
9-During execution of a standard UMS-check, the Engineer on Duty is experiencing a "low water level" alarm in a cooling water expansion tank. What will be the appropriate  immediate action?
Correct water level is obtained by refilling the cooling system, and the entire system is checked for leakages
10-What are the compartments to be regularly checked with regard to water and oil leakages?
All those listed in the other alternatives
11-During a routine check of one of the auxiliary engines in an UMS operated engine room, a minor leakage on a high pressure fuel pipe was observed. What would be an appropriate action and/or precaution to be taken? (Assume normal operation; 2 sets operating and 1 set standby)
Change operation to the third generator set, preparing the original set for  repair of the failure and switching to manual mode until repair is carried out.
12-During routine checking of alarm functions of main and auxiliary equipment, some setpoints are canceled due to a mistake.   What will be the appropriate  routine to ensure correct setpoints are set?
Consult with the instruction manual for the equipment in question for correct values.
13-One or a certain number of smoke sensors are switched off during routine maintenance work to prevent false alarm. During coffee break the following precautions are taken:
All alarms are reengaged prior to switching to UMS-mode
14-Gas welding is carried out in the work shop. Prior to lunch break the following precaution is carried out:
The main supply valves in the deck storage are closed prior to switching to UMS-mode
15-What precaution is to be taken when the Engineer on Duty is entering an UMS-mode operated engine room due to an alarm or due to a scheduled routine check?
Switch the UMS selector switch to manual mode and engage the "dead man alarm"
16-The general purpose personnel is carrying out maintenance work in the engine room on overtime. The work does not affect operation. At the end of normal working hours, what does the Engineer on Duty do?
Continue with manual operated engine room until the maintenance work is finished
17-Before engaging the Turning Gear, precautions should be taken to:
Shut off the starting air supply and open the indicator cocks
19-What is the purpose of the Oil Mist Detector?
To detect oil mist (explosive athmosphere in the crankcase).
20-What is the safe time for operating the crankcase door when oil mist alarm is activated and the engine has been stopped?
After 20 minutes
21-What is the purpose of the engine crankcase door's relief valves?
To relief pressure in a crankcase explosion
22-The main engine is running steady. What is the normal slow down temperature for the main engine thrust bearing segment?
75° C
23-The main engine is running steady. What is the normal shut down temperature for the main engine thrust bearing segment?
85° C
24-The main engine is running steady. What is the normal slow down temperature for the main bearing metal "Oil outlet temperature"?
70° C
25-The main engine is running steady. What is the normal shut down pressure for "Lub.oil inlet to main bearings"?
1,0 Bar
26-The main engine is running steady. What is the normal shut down pressure for "Lub. oil inlet to camshaft"?
1,5 Bar
28-The main engine is running steady.  What is the normal slow down/shutdown temperature for "Fresh cooling water outlet cylinder"?
95° C
29-The main engine is running steady: What is the normal slow down/alarm pressure for "Fresh cooling water across engine"?
0,2 Bar
30-The main engine is running steady.  What is the normal slow down temperature for scavenge air boxes "Fire alarm"?
120° C
31-The main engine is running steady with exhaust gas temperature approximately 350° C.  What is the normal slow down temperature for exhaust gas deviation from average?
+/- 50° C
32-What is the normal procedure for safe operation when one of the main engine fuel pumps is to be put out of action?
Reduce main engine setting to stop
33-The most important preparation prior to Arrival to / Departure from ports is:
Start an additional auxiliary engine
34-Your vessel has a controllable pitch propeller. The engine can be started when the propeller pitch is:
Zero
35-You are onboard a vessel with a 6 cylinder main engine. During emergency running with one cylinder out of operation the engine load must be reduced to:
70 % of MCR
37-With the compensating needle screw of a Woodward regulator is closed, what will happen when the load is changing?
Woodward regulator will regulate very slowly
39-Electric arc welding is to be carried out in the machinery spaces other than the workshop. Which of the alternatives below would be the correct procedure for the connection of the "return" cable to the welding set?
Any of the listed alternatives.
41-Before leaving the machinery spaces of a UMS vessel whose engine room is covered by a fixed CO2 installation, should the duty engineer:
Ensure all doors are in closed position.
42-Before leaving the machinery spaces of a UMS vessel after routine watchkeeping rounds in the evening, the duty engineer inspects the doors to Fuel Oil Treatment rooms covered by a fixed fire fighting installation. For what purpose does he do this?
Close them to prevent the spread of fire, and allow the extinguishant to be released without time wasting.
43-The duty engineer of a UMS ship is approached by a member of the ship's staff, seeking permission to hang wet working clothes in the engine room to dry. Should he:
Not allow the clothes to be hung anywhere in the unmanned machinery spaces.
44-During UMS rounds, a duty engineer notices that the fuel oil overflow observation glass is full of oil. Should he:
Stop all F.O. transfers immediately, and inform the CE.
45-At what time should the duty engineer perform his evening UMS rounds?
At any time, provided he is confident that the engine room will operate in a safe and efficient manner for the period it will be left unattended.
46-When entering data into the official engine room log book, what colour writing should be used providing the entries are neat and legible?
Black/blue ink.

-------------------машинное отделение
1-What do you have to ensure when pumping from double bottom tanks to day- and settling tanks?
That the pump is stopped in time to avoid overflowing.
2-What shall you do if you are in the engine room and the alarm for "CO2 system in the engine room" is released?
Leave the engine room immediately.
3-What is the meaning of "stand by"?
That the watch keeping personnel shall be ready for starting or manoeuvring the main engine.
4-Why can wearing sweat rags slung round your neck be hazardous?
The rags may be caught by a revolving shaft.
5-Why shall engine and boiler rooms be kept clean and oil spillage removed?
To reduce danger of fire and the risks of sliding.
6-When shall you use goggles?
When you need to protect your eyes.
7-Why do you sometimes have to remove guards or other safety devices from machinery?
Sometimes it is necessary to facilitate overhauling.
8-What may be the cause of black smoke from the funnel?
Incomplete combustion owing to wrong mixture of air and oil.
9-What types of fire extinguishers shall be used in the engine room?
Fire extinguishers equipped for powder or CO2 only.


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понедельник, 17 сентября 2012 г.

Путин виноват!

Кошка бросила котят.
Это Путин виноват.
Зайку бросила хозяйка.
Кто виновен, угадайка!
Вот кончается доска
У несчастного бычка.
Наша Таня громко плачет.
Рядом Путин, не иначе.
Свет погас, упал забор,
У авто заглох мотор,
Зуб здоровый удалили,
Иль залез в квартиру вор,
Не понравилось кино,
Наступили Вы в говно.
У любого катаклизма
Объяснение одно:
Знает каждый демократ -
Это Путин виноват!

среда, 12 сентября 2012 г.

Интересное в сети


Если у вас давно не было секса, ситуацию исправит простое бытовое изнасилование.

- Дочка, ты замуж выходить собираешься?
- Кто? Я? Да вы что?! У меня хомяк жил - сдох, а муж - это такая ответственность! Не-е-е!...

- Моя жена убежала с моим лучшим другом!
- Да ты что?! А с кем?
- Я его не знаю, но все равно, теперь он мой лучший друг!

Поступай с людьми так, как тебе хотелось бы, чтобы они поступали с тобой. Подари мужу цветы.

Большинство проблем в отношениях возникают из-за того, что кто-то в паре - долбоёб. Что примечательно, если долбоёбами являются оба партнёра, отношения, как правило, складываются удачные и спокойные.


Дэвид Коперфильд может не только проходить сквозь стены, но и проносить через них 40 ящиков водки - утверждал сторож магазина

У молодой учительницы с большой грудью, за первой партой сидят пять человек.

То есть Вы считаете, Пётр, что единственное, что не устраивает меня в Вашей дипломной работе, которую я только что получил на e-mail — это «ошибочное» название «Свежескаченное Говнецо»?

Закрой глаза и представь, что я рядом...теперь открой и обломайся

Мальчик потерял веру в логику, когда на пасеке его укусила коза.

Чудесный сон приснился мне когда-то... четыре грузчика несли мою зарплату.

Если вам уделяют слишком много внимания, значит вас хотят либо наебать, либо выебать.

Интересное наблюдение: если носить в руке хороший кусочек кирпича и показывать его водителям, то и лужи они аккуратно объезжают, и на переходах вежливо пропускают...

Специально проснулся в 8, чтобы перезвонить своим друзьям-уебкам и спросить чего они хотели ночью.

Дача - это место, где саженец становится деревом, семечко - овощем, а человек - раком.

Очень хочу ребенка... мальчика... лет 25-ти. =)

Петя неожиданно вбежал в спальню к родителям и застал аиста врасплох.

Как выразить свою любовь к..?

- Ты меня любишь?
- Ты же знаешь...
- А смог бы прыгнуть из окна ради меня?
- А ты толкни...

вторник, 11 сентября 2012 г.

Цитаты дня

Чем умнее девушка тем изысканнее и разнообразнее она ебет мозги своему мужчине!

Жду её как ребенок деда-мороза!

Пришёл. Увидел. Наплевал.

Можно еще раз поцеловать?

- Помнешь, я вчера поцеловал тебя в губы?!
- Да.
- Слушай, ты такая вкусная, можно ещё раз?!

Купить иван-чай


Вес: 100 грамм
Цена: 30 гривен
Место сбора: вся продукция собирается в экологически чистых районах украинских Карпат
Вид упаковки: полиэтиленовый пакет

Инструкция на украинском языке

Доставка: Киев, Харьков, Донецк, Львов, Одесса, Луганск, а также другие города Украины (Укрпочта, Нова почта, Ин-Тайм и т.д.)
Оплата: наложенным платежом, карта ПриватБанка, webmoney.

Купить иван-чай можно по телефонах:
+38 (067) 845-32-41
+38 (093) 290-44-95

Травы собираются только вручную и не подвергаются механической и химической обработке

Работаем на рынке заготовки лекарственных трав - 8 лет

воскресенье, 9 сентября 2012 г.

Какой он хороший вечер?

...
Он
давай, удачной уборки и хорошего вечера
Она
и тебе хорошего вечера)
Он
он был бы хороший, если бы приятная во всех отношениях девушка в гости зашла... даже без пошлых мотивов...

пятница, 7 сентября 2012 г.

В копирайте как в спорте...

Самые лучшие спортсмены нашего времени - это копирайтеры. От части и я к ним отношусь.


Объявление сниму квартиру

Учитесь как нужно составлять объявления по поводу съема квартир. Уверен, что предложения не заставят себя ждать и людям за креатив обязательно позвонят.

Оригинальный вход в метро

Это самый оригинальный вход в метро, который мне попадался. Возле такой красоты любят фотографироваться. Почему у нас такое не строят?


Красиво и идейно разукрасили город

Очень часто в городах видишь как забомбили ту или иную стену. Но в основной своей массе это все как то безвкусно без идеи, но есть ребята которые красиво и идейно разукрашивают город. У них можно поучиться, ведь креатив рулил во все времена. И смотрится очень даже ни чего.


О чем думаешь, о том и говоришь

Часто бывает так, что тупишь. Я думал около минуты ищя правильные ответ на вопрос: "Какое слово сказал паровозик?" Постоянно выскакивала другая не нужная комбинация букв. Но скорее всего это не моя вина, а вина дизайнера-составителя детской раскраски. Разве можно такое давать детям? Дизайнеру нужно надавать по рогам!


четверг, 6 сентября 2012 г.

График доходности на форекс

Хочу тупо похвастаться. Это мой график доходности на форекс. Красным выделено снятие и возвращение депозита на родину. Кто хочет получить пароль инвестора от счета, обращайтесь. Скидывайте в комменты свои мыла, отправлю, даже бесплатно.


вторник, 4 сентября 2012 г.

Предложение праздника

После Дня Знаний обязательно нужно ввести Ночь Умений...

Моя цитата

"Пытаясь забыть прошлое, забываешь о настоящем и ставишь под угрозу будущее."
Сам придумал.

Самые популярные крылатые фразы

Крылатых фраз много, но самые популярные следующие:

  • Надежда — это сон наяву. (Аристотель)
  • Нельзя объять необъятное. (Козьма Прутков)
  • Нет правды на земле, но правды нет и выше. (А. С. Пушкин)
  • Благими намерениями вымощена дорога в ад. (вероятно, С. Джонсон)
  • И ты, Брут?! (Шекспир,«Юлий Цезарь»).
  • Умри, — лучше не напишешь. (Потёмкин — Фонвизину)
  • Возвращаться на круги своя (Книга Екклесиаста)
  • После нас хоть потоп. (приписывается маркизе де Помпадур)
  • Потёмкинские деревни (из мемуаров XVIII века)
  • Смесь французского с нижегородским (Горе от ума)
  • Боливар не снесёт двоих. («Акула» Додсон в рассказе О. Генри)
  • Важно не как проголосуют, а как подсчитают (приписывается И. Сталину, в романе Рыбакова «Дети Арбата»)
  • Вор должен сидеть в тюрьме. (Г. Жеглов в исполнении В. Высоцкого, к/ф «Место встречи изменить нельзя»)
  • I'll be back… («Терминатор» (А. Шварценнегер, к/ф Терминатор)
  • Люблю запах напалма по утру. (к/ф Апокалипсис сегодня)
  • Шурик, это же не наш метод... (Федя, к/ф Операция «Ы» и другие приключения Шурика#Напарник)
  • Надо, Федя, надо! (оттуда же)
  • Жить хорошо… А хорошо жить — ещё лучше! (к/ф Кавказская пленница, или Новые приключения Шурика)
  • Птица говорун отличается умом и сообразительностью. (м/ф Тайна третьей планеты)
  • Хотели как лучше, а получилось как всегда (В. Черномырдин)
  • Мочить в сортире (В. В. Путин)
  • «партия жуликов и воров» (Алексей Навальный).

понедельник, 3 сентября 2012 г.

Смотреть и видеть по-китайски

Видите что здесь написано?
Нет?
А вот китайцы видят :)



Для того что бы прочитать надпись, потяните за уголки глаз :)

воскресенье, 2 сентября 2012 г.

Takata

Вашему вниманию представляется ну просто офигенная песня takata.



Клип takata еще можно просмотреть на ютубе по адресу
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJ-CmHZrKHU
откуда, кстати, и было вставлено это видео.

Перевод песни takata шикарно представлен по ссылке
http://www.amalgama-lab.com/songs/r/romano/tacata.html

Скачать takata можно, спрашивайте у гугла.

Исполнители takata: Tacabro - Tacata - Blanco y Negro Music

Музыка, песня, клип takata супер, наслаждайтесь.